Hi everyone –
Physically, I don’t feel that much different – I need a bit more sleep, my throat feels kind of “thick” with just a bit of difficulty talking sometimes. The hard part is yet to come.
Emotionally, I’m coming to terms with what’s coming down the road. I’ve learned a ton in the past week, and all of the information has helped turned a big scary mystery into a big scary plan. But I no longer have “fear of the unknown.” I know it will be uncomfortable and then painful and I just have to be here for it.

The number of appointments and scans involved in planning for cancer treatment is just ridiculous (but everything has a reason – no complaints). Trying to fit all of this into my work schedule has been a challenge, but work has been really supportive – no one is complaining that I’m missing half the time. I’m keeping a log of appointments I’ve had or that are coming:
Feb 11 – GP first appointment with throat concerns
Feb 27 – ENT specialist who did the biopsy
March 4 – CT scan, Oakland
March 6 – Scan follow-up with head cancer surgeon
March 9 – Start diet/exercise/fasting for PET scan
March 10 – Blood panel
March 11 – PET scan with radioactive tracer to see whether there was further spread
March 12 – Video visit with oncology specialist
March 13 – Radiologist meeting – general info
March 14 – Medical leave arrangements mtg at work
March 18 – Audiologist – Radiation could affect my hearing
March 18 – Cancer dentist – radiation will affect my teeth
March 19 – Final more CT scan – the mapping/planning one (super detailed)
March 24 – Speech pathologist – like PT but for speed
I’ll have a start date after the mapping scan on March 19 – probably the 2nd week of April. From that point, I’ll have one 4-hour chemo session per week, which will wipe me out (exhaustion), and five 10-minute radiation treatments per week. The whole course lasts 7 weeks. Then I need a full month of recovery. The effects of radiation discomfort will actually continue for the first couple weeks of recovery.
Then more scans and checkups for quite a while, tapering off over time. If after five years there are no further signs, I’ll be considered clear.
For the radiation, they’ll be making a mesh mask of my face. I’ll lay down, they’ll put the mask on my face, bolt the mask to a frame, and bolt the frame to the table. The target markings will be on the mask. That’s how they’ll keep radiation directed at precisely the right spots, and have a consistent reference from visit to visit.
I’m supposed to be trying to gain weight right now – if I lose more than 10% of body weight, I’ll have to go on a feeding tube they’ll implant in my abdomen.
I have to see a special radiation dentist to prepare to deal with damage to teeth (which already aren’t great). And I have to meet a speech pathologist to minimize effects on my speech.
I asked whether there was a possibility I could do some of it from my parents’ house at a different clinic and they said no – it’s important to have the same gear and the same care team for all sessions. I’m sorry.
My medical leave at work – I’ll have job protection and stay on benefits for 3 months, but California SDI will pay 90% of my salary. That squares well with the expected amount of time for treatment. If it goes longer, there are other options, but I may have to rely on insurance or just go without pay for a while. But I don’t think there will be.
I’ve been so impressed by all of the doctors and caregivers – everyone is super sharp and friendly and it’s clear they’ve all been doing this for a long time. I have total confidence in all of them.
Amy is amazing – such a great researcher, and getting ready with special recipes, a new blanket and pillow, house supplies, preparing to take off work to drive me to chemo, etc. I am so lucky to have her here for me.
The doctor insisted I go on the work ski trip next week so that’s what I’ll be doing! Doctor’s orders, you know. :)
That’s all I can think of for now. Feel free to ask me anything.
Love,
Scot
My dad had that mesh mask! Might be a good time to invest in audiobooks or to make playlists. I offered to do that for my dad, who is a long-time (50 years) buddhist practitioner and he was a little aghast. He said, “this is a great time to strengthen my practice.” Just food for thought if you are a meditator, too. Wish you the very best!
Also, shout out to Amy. She sounds rock solid.
I hope treatment treats you well, Scot! Sounds like you have a great support network, so that’s awesome! Wishing for the best outcome for you.
Cari
Thank you for this. Huge undertaking.
Impressive schedule. Here’s to you and your teams.
@marya Your dad sounds an incredible human! And you’re right, meditation ought to be a card on the table for me – thanks for the suggestion. The mask thing seems totally sci-fi, but I guess that’s my life now.
Wishing you the best on your journey.
I’m so glad you have a good team who you trust, Scot. It is, indeed, scary. And even though the plan is scary, too, I’m glad you have a good plan — and that you have Amy.
You’ve many friends and supporters, Scott. Please let us know if we can contribute to the simple creation of meals for you. I just made some awesome chili (so I do say) and while premature, it can be made again, divided into containers and frozen, to be enjoyed anytime thawing and hearing happen!
All the best to you during this ordeal, Scot. Love to you and Amy from Hawai’i.
Marisa, Gary, Michi, you all have hearts of gold, and I appreciate you so much. Thanks for the good vibes and kind offers – I’m going to need them.